Do You Suck At Receiving? Too Bad. I'm Forcing Magic On You, No Matter What. Plus, Tomorrow's Brunch For Weirdos. (Bring Bagels?)

Open this email ONLY if you love bookstores. Ignore if you hate joy, sunlight, democracy. My son Charlie Mel will personally judge you if you skip this one, though.

No, my son will not judge you.

I will.¹

After you watch my Ted talk, let me know what you think the secret is? Reply to this email or comment right here:

Also, yay! You opened the email which means you not only love bookstores, but you you love joy, sunlight and DEMOCRACY. Because lord of cold coffee that’s been microwaved 7 times, help us all with whatever Black Mirror episodes we’re living through day after day since he has been in office (and no, I shall not name his stupidasspitiful name.)

But because I do love you and bookstores- so much that it hurts- I’m reminding you that today is Indie Bookstore Day.

This means it’s our sacred duty to THROW MONEY AT THE HEROES WHO KEEP CIVILIZATION ALIVE.

Truth is, without indie bookstores we’d all be buying books from the same sad algorithm and crying alone in our granny undies. (See my last post on here for that reference.) Let’s cry together instead of alone?

I’m doing a real Pastiloff crying/laughing together kinda thing and we are going to save indie bookstores one chaotic weirdo at a time (hi, it’s you. And me. Hi, us.)

Buy 5 books: win a retreat/massage/lifetime subscription to this weird magic and overthrow capitalism.

How it works:
Buy 5 copies of my upcoming book Proof of Life from Vroman’s here (a national treasure), and email me the screenshot. If you buy 10, your name is entered twice, of course.
✨ You INSTANTLY get a lifetime paid subscription to my Substack (the mothership of all our chaos and magic)
✨ you get entered into a giveaway to win a spot at my next intimate Ojai retreat (Oct 2-5) plus a massage, because obviously your nervous system deserves it. I mean, mine does at least, so I am guessing yours might too.
Basically, it’s thousands of dollars with of serotonin for the price of 5 delicious smelling² signed books. Signed!

Even if you don’t win the retreat/massage, you already won by saving the endangered unicorns of humanity: independent bookstores.
And honestly? That’s the kind of main character energy I endorse.

You also win signed copies and you win at love and supporting others, which is huge in my book. My book book, bit it’s also huge in Proof Of Life.

Buy the books. Save the world. Maybe get a massage. Definitely get my eternal love.

2 winners will be picked LIVE here on May 2 at 7 pm pst by my chaos agent aka my extremely charming soon-to-be-nie-how-did-this-happen-he-was-just-born-last-week-the-fuck-even-is-time son Charlie Mel.

There will be 2 winners because I’m bad at moderation (hello0000- why I stopped drinking.) Bad at moderation, good at love. Bad at waitressing, good with people. Et al.

Two winners means your chance of winning is greater.

If you’d like a list of various places to preorder my book from, click here, or on the photo below of me (taken by T. Chick McClure.)

I will still honour upgrading you to a paid membership if you get one copy (6 months paid), 2 copies (a year paid), and 3 copies gets you a lifetime paid subscription. Just email me a screenshot.

Now, on to the meat of this love letter.

How good are you at receiving?

Like, on a scale of 1-10.

That is not rhetorical. Do you suck at it? Are you meh. Great at it? I’m talking about receiving: love, help, compliments, tenderness, free coffee, slightly wilted flowers, orgasms (I dunno, I just finished watching Dying For Sex, which I highly rec), what you asked for, miracles... whatever.

Notice I added in what you asked for.

Consider how often shit shows up that we asked for and yet, we don’t receive it. This is either because we don’t see it (when we don’t believe we get to have it, we can’t even see it, even if it is right in front of us- which I talk about in my TED talk); or because it doesn’t look like we imagined it would look like.

If you're anything like me- aka a wildy disorganized very deaf lover of people but hater of reality tv and goat cheese (don’t come at me for that either) with slight (fine, bigger than slight) abandonment issues and a complicated relationship to generosity (I love being generous more than anything (except my son) and yet, yet I still struggle with being on the other end of it- then you might also be weirdly bad at receiving or maybe meh at it.
Like, "oh no you really didn’t have to!" while sweating profusely and handing the gift back. Even when the gift is a verbal compliment. Sigh.

Katie Hendricks taught a workshop with me today all about the art of receiving — the heart stuff, the hard stuff, the hilarious stuff. All the good stuff.
I recorded it for you. Here: https://us02web.zoom.us/rec/share/rBw6PSbO0DvmGqL6ITkrAXQfvit91RXMI-Gikjdand3ldi0XpV0ZLx6BHw-A-T4l.e9ti9KZGYKDpuyN6

See? You can already practice receiving. You’re welcome.

AND tomorrow we’re doing something I’m excited-slash-over-caffeinated about:

✨ Weirdos Unite: Awkward Family Brunch ✨
Our first ever virtual brunch where we’ll get to know each other, write a little, laugh a lot, discuss Very Important Things, and let’s be real (because f*ck fake) cry too. Snot always flies, what can I say? (There is always more laughter than crying though. Always.)

No pressure, no perfection, just a bunch of loveable and delicious weirdos showing up with their sense of humour and big hearts. If you do not have a sense of humour, you better pretend or else go get one real quick. :)

And guess what? EVERYONE is invited.
Paid, unpaid, lurking in the shadows — doesn't matter.

You belong.

Pajamas encouraged. (I’m not trying to see any of yous³ naked. K thanks.) Coffee mandatory. Bagels welcome. Judgment banned. (So are assholes.) Remember our policy: Don’t be An Asshole, ESPECIALLY TO YOURSELF!

Come be a person with us. I dare you.

Love you already,
me
(Chief Weirdo)

P.S. If you want the recording from today's workshop, go back and look for it above. It’s right there waiting for you like a puppy with a slightly chewed slipper or one random sock (because I have never ever in the history of socks have worn a matching pair) and why am I lying? I have never worn slippers. I don’t know why. They bug me. Like I said about the word panties the other day. They just do. I like bare feet. Except not on an airplane, okay?

Tomorrow’s Zoom info for Weirdos Unite Awkward Family Brunch. Please come, weirdo. In fact, that’s the password: Weirdo.

Apr 27, 2025 11:00 AM Pacific Time (US and Canada)

Join Zoom Meeting

https://us02web.zoom.us/j/83382612671?pwd=aSyAz03EKToKKzuftBGJPBcU4QCbzg.1

Meeting ID: 833 8261 2671

Password: Weirdo

Let me know if you’re coming tomorrow?

Next Saturday May 3 (how the F is it gonna be May already?) From 10 am to 12 p pst on May 3, we have a writing workshop called This Is Going To Get Messy with the amazing author of Okay Fine Whatever: The Year I Went From Being Afraid of Everything to Only Being Afraid of Most Things,

Courtenay Hameister

. You do not want to miss this. Trust me. I’ll send Zoom to paid peeps in a couple days, as well as announce next Sunday’s session, too. Read her Substack here.

She.Is.Just.So.Good.

I really do hope you enter the retreat/massage giveaway if you can afford it because indie bookstores are the emotional support animals of humanity, and my gosh, we need those animals now more than ever.

I have more announcements as fas as my book tour that I will be announcing. Where would you like me to visit? I’d love to hear…

1. I won’t! I mean, not for that, at least.

2. Don’t you love the smell of new books, and bookstores in general? Come on… let’s save them!

3. That’s the South Philly in me. Yous. Or is it you’s?